♥ Greatest of these.

Awweeesomeee!

2008-06-09T18:00:39Z

BLAZE was just too good to be true.
Well, feedback varies, but i dont care, such are the memories that cannot be taken away, such are these that will be kept close dear to our hearts. I'm definitely feeling extremely nostalgic, especially after viewing the TRIBUTE video on youtube. Just makes me wanna cry! I'm really swept away by all the memories. It's a good thing.

Poisson, Le Chatelier and Fleming. They shall be my very best friends for noww ):
DIEE.

So what's life all about? I think i dont wanna grow old.

I miss this kid very muchh. Never ever gonna see him again, but always dear to me.

Now we remain

2008-04-29T15:55:17Z

I've been busy all this while i was away.
There're certain reasons i avoid coming online too, those shall be left unsaid.

Well tennis is (sadly?) over. I'm gonna miss the whole experience with the team. Well, i guess the experience is smth no one can ever take away from you yourself.
Then there's dance aheadd, and midyears, i'm trying to pick up from here and make sure i dont get left behind!

Running away, i'm running away from the whole shizz, i'm not gna care. It's been so darn long.
I've been immersing myself in fairly optimistic quotes like, if it's meant to be, it is; everything happens for a reason, ecetera.
In fact, I've been GOOD this way, and i'm definitely not gonna let it get me down, no where.
I'll find my feet, get a grip and make sure i stand strong in tt mud.
It all seems like nothing, but a blurry yesterday.

Starlight, starbright.
First star i see tonight,
wish i might,
wish i may,
can i have my wish tonight?
(smth like tt. hahah)

Been a long time since i sang tt to myself, until i looked outta my window on my bed before i slept just recently.

I definitely have this thingg for geeks :D That's not the point, hahah.
I find myself pretty feministic, I feel very strongly. But then again, I have this soft spot, or rather, strong sentiment for gentlemen.
In that case, i'm not being feministic anymore 'cos women wld then have to open doors ourselves. In fact, i get impressed with gentlemanly acts, and disgusted if not. Idk why, but i've this thing for talents too, impressive. It all boils down to responsibility and taking pride in work i guess, very impt.

Go girl.

Mundane

2008-03-23T13:10:10Z

Heavy feeling..

Maybe it's the corrinne may songs, but i heart.

It's backk to tennis once agn, idk but i feel scared somehow.

This year's lent and good friday has never been so before. I didnt feel much, maybe i'm losing faith. But i definitely still trust deeply.
Instead i think i've been shutting out, becoming a sunday catholic. Things are just not the same anymore. I'm starting to feel this live for the moment thang. I really wanna do alot of things for Him. I suddenly feel a lack of reflection and i really am rather ignorant about the things i do nowadays (or all along). I'm starting to do things i know i shouldnt be doing. Then again, it's.. I just wanna live for the moment.
crap i feel bad. so bad. Sorry, and praise and glory to You, King of Kings. Missing you much ;(

Nichole Nordeman - Why

We rode into town the other day
Just me and my Daddy
He said I'd finally reached that age
And I could ride next to him on a horse
That of course was not quite as wide

We heard a crowd of people shouting
And so we stopped to find out why
And there was that man
That my dad said he loved
But today there was fear in his eyes

So I said "Daddy, why are they screaming?
Why are the faces of some of them beaming?
Why is He dressed in that bright purple robe?
I'll bet that crown hurts Him more than He shows
Daddy, please can't you do something?
He looks as though He's gonna cry
you said he was stronger than all of those guys
addy, please tell me why
Why does everyone want him to die?"

Later that day the sky grew cloudy
And Daddy said I should go inside
Somehow he knew things would get stormy
Boy was he right
But I could not keep from wondering
If there was something he had to hide

So after he left I had to find out
I was not afraid of getting lost
So I followed the crowds
To a hill where I knew men had been killed
And I heard a voice come from the cross

And it said, "Father, why are they screaming?
Why are the faces of some of them beaming?
Why are they casting their lots for My robe?
This crown of thorns hurts Me more than it shows
Father, please can't You do something?
I know that You must hear My cry
I thought I could handle the cross of this size
Father, remind Me why
Why does everyone want Me to die?
When will I understand why?"

"My precious Son, I hear them screaming
I'm watching the face of the enemy beaming
But soon I will clothe You in robes of My own
Jesus, this hurts Me much more than You know
But this dark hour I must do nothing
Though I've heard Your unbearable cry
The power in Your blood destroys all of the lies
Soon You'll see past their unmerciful eyes
Look there below, see the child
Trembling by her father's side
Now I can tell You why
She is why You must die"

So beautiful right. One of my fave christian songs.
Well, tht's for Good Friday. Now it's easter.
Truth be told, it really isn't significant for me this year. But i'm still gonna try make it more significant. Hope so.

So what's this heavy feeling i'm getting..? :(

Oh, friend just randomly said i need the dove advert. program. HAAHHAHAH.

Feedback feedback uh oh. Yeah my sexy sexy sexy! (keeps playing in my head!)

Anw, CTs somehow turned out to be a fluke. Gee, a surprise.

Back

2008-03-16T13:27:51Z

No shizz, the march holss are overrrr.

I'm starting to lose myself, everything's stressing me out.

I dont feel like myself, crap. I hate this, get a grip!

CTs

2008-02-23T08:07:39Z

CTs are just in a week or so. I'm really dead.
Thoughts of retaining have always been in my head but i doubt mom and dad would ever allow tt.
I've never really dared to ask, but isnt it rather rational to ensure you get your foundation strong first then excel in A's, no?

As what the sexies were talking abt, jack of all trades, master of none, I long to just meet someone who'd appreciate and be really proud of who i am and what i can do, and find tt someone whom i'd be really proud of to be with. Patience.

Trades, of which i really didnt/cant master any ):
Golf
Ballet
Keyboard
Violin
Tennis and other sports
Dance

I gave up on almost everything, yeah. Oh

I <3 sexies much.

I miss tennis. Somehow, i just wished i'd stuck to it, all the more since dance is getting me on a mental high, stressful buzz. But i guess things wouldnt have been the same if i did, and there wouldnt be mah sexies.

Cant wait for CTs to be over!

To deb:
Hope things will really take a turn for the better, sometimes i feel rather helpless. You know i suck at comforting sometimes. My apologies! Me love you always!

To end off, mah lovelies at CNY m'sia steamboat <3

Outta tt bittersweet thing

2008-02-12T12:56:01Z

Oh happy day!

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

Sucked in that deep hole called, love. I'm out and happy.

School so COOLZZ.

No direction

2008-02-09T05:37:04Z

There hasnt been much happening arnd, it's starting to get back to normal life.(What is normal??)
Sometimes i look forward to school when i'm home, cos it really keeps me occupied.
But all that homework, nono.

Happy lunar new year anyway.
It's becoming more of an annual routine now, rather boring CNY. Sigh.
There's not even the excitement to open those red packets, not at all.
But i'm really glad with all the family time. I lovee.

I'm starting to feel more attached to certain ppl, which is good.
On the other hand, i tend to shut myself out from some. My apologies.

Hopefully i'll find the time to upload pics.

I was told i shld simply forgo the friendship.
I dont have much to say, but, 2 years down, 5 or 10, whatever it is.. whatever.

I dont know what i'm saying.. hahahah. Random post. Just some thoughts.

Basking in the limelight, you are.
Dont ever forget, my friend, your friends.
Dont you ever for a second think you're irreplaceable.
Stay the same. Stay the same.
Remember, and remember deeply.

Harden this spot of mine, and I'll be just fine.
Impossible remedy.

Just like a tattoo

2008-01-16T15:03:47Z

Today was a pretty good day, finally a first in the new year.
It includes not thinking too much, being preoccupied, smiling (though not exactly my ol' happy happy smile), sweethearts who really brighten my day, and mummy's hug. Aww..
Tmr will be a good one too, i hope.
(I tried saying, "it's a happy day, it's a happy day." when i woke up one of the past morning, but apparently, maybe psychologically, it doesn't help. hahahah, oh well.)

♥ lynette; says:

eh if you wanna talk abt rship stuff and all i'm always here yeah (:
GABOO. says:
lol
GABOO. says:
u ah
GABOO. says:
y everyone can tell u abt relationship one
GABOO. says:
lol
♥ lynette; says:
hahaha
GABOO. says:
like ur here for everyone la
GABOO. says:
damm cool
GABOO. says:
gd wat.. tt means everyone trust u
♥ lynette; says:
ij girls like tt one mah. hahah
GABOO. says:
really ah
GABOO. says:
didnt know that
♥ lynette; says:
no luh. hahah. more emo. haha. the other girls not so emo like me. hahahaah

tt's emo girls for you.

Know not how

2008-01-11T14:06:25Z

Often, you do things you aren't supposed to.
You want to know things tt you shouldn't know, just shouldn't.
But time and again, you cant control.
These things they just hurt you more and more.
So, dont be STUPSSSSSSSS.
Lynette, dont be stups!

I've school, and i'm glad i have, though it's been really tiring.
I guess it's just this week. It's good to keep yourself occupied tho!

It's not the same anymore, I'm not the same anymore too.

Tired.
Sleep glorious sleep!

So close, to tears.

2007-12-27T17:22:18Z

It's been awhile since i've cried. Dont know why, sometimes you just feel emo, it just hurts deep inside, especially with that broken heart and you meet that someone whom you've shared unprecedented joy again, you feel like tearing your heart out, your tears are close to trickling down (or already are). My sentiments exactly.

HELP ME, PLEASEEE.

I guess only time can help me.

Maybe i'm just in self-denial, i thought i was over it. Guess i'm not.
And it hurts actually, that your onced loved is much much way over it.
Is it better to not meet that person and get over it, or get used to meeting him and get over it?

Meeting Jane today was awesome. Catching up's all good, someone's a lucky boy, she's lovely.

Okay, mum's been seriously not helping now tt i'm actually breaking down.
i'm just too lazy to explain things to her or how i feel.
Maybe i'm being stubborn. She wants me to stay away from church for now, but it's not like i go down just to see him. That's not it!
So i guess i'm supposed to rot at home, dont express my emotions either online or on the phone.
Isolation is that it? Seems like only studies are on her list. What to do? ));

It's been 3 weeks or so. I thought i was fine, not until today.

Let go, let go, let go.
It spells: H, E, L, P.

Tis' the season to be jolly! (lonely?)

2007-12-21T17:55:38Z

(Omg, livejournal just accidentally deleted my completed post. NYEH.)

Christmas is just about next week. I feel unprepared. Not prepared much presents, not started on writing cards, letters.. Much less homework. I just feel different. I guess every year's different 'cos i meet new people along the way and you spend festive seasons like these with different people. I dont know how to explain this feeling but it's somewhat like.. Christmas is next week, Yay! But i havent done/prepared anything much! And there's so little time left! Uhoh. Hahah. Caroling just ended today, and being one of the ICs, I dont know whether to feel happy or sad ): I feel quite accomplished but lil upset that it's over alr.. But i guess, i'm feeling rather joyful. Oh the joy of christmas!

HOHO, 28th next week SEXIES sleepover + gift exchange! Then dance on 29th and 30th, Oschool! Sounds good!

Ohman, 1t19, i dont know what to say. I dont think i'd ever say i love my class ); Girls, m.i.a; Boys, SOCCER SOCCER SOCCER, sick jokes and what else? PSP. Sigh. I guess this class wasn't what i expected. Did i even have any expectations? Hmm. Well one thing's applicable though. BOYS ARE SMELLYYY! Woah, the smell is just overpowering, i tell you. I guess perhaps it's just the cj pe shirt. But i just tadboleh tahan when they hang 'em up on the window panes after PE. KILL ME! Oh wells. That's how i'd remember 1t19. Let's hope 2t19 would be smth lovelier. (I doubt so, anw!) HAHAH. sigh.

For the fun of it. My christmas present to myself. HAHA.
Wish there was permanent-airbrush kinda, instead of NEEDLES! I'd prolly get one then.
Maybe there would be a tan of it 'cos i went shweeeming today! Hahaha.
My stamina's so bad, sumpa!
I've changed from sporty girl to girly girl this year, seriously. 170 degress change!
Dont know why. I used to love PE but i hate 'em now.
I kinda miss tennis a lil' though, wanna see how bad i am now, been a year and a half ++ already!

Mudd style,
Ooh i like :D
Lonely boys,
sounds good eh?
HOHOHO.
Shnizzle my nizzle!
Random, teehee.

Where'd you go, I miss you so.
Seriously.

Let me hold you

2007-12-19T16:12:29Z

I was surprised i survived the day without much sleep, to be exact, 2 hours.
First of a kind i think, hoho.

Ryan's so darn good. Whoo. He really has the flair for choreo man.
Cj dance is improving and i'm so glad, considering we're all noobs to this.
YAY. Rock and roll! :D

Gifts exchange comin' up!
It's the first time tt i dont have anything in mind tt i want even though people are offering to buy me what i want.
Surprise surprise. Well, i really have no idea what i want ):
Gah.

I really like this shirt. It's uber funny. Haha.

I hate leaving things unsettled. My heart's feeling battered, i wish i could rip it out somehow.
Many things in the past, left unsettled, and all that is coming back. Uh oh );

okay, i'm feeling tired now. caroling tmr, hoho. please be good! =\

In my arms,
In my mind,
All the time I wanna
Keep you right by my side till I die.
I'm gonna
Hold you down and make sure everything is right with you.
You can never go wrong if you
Let me hold you,
Down like a real friend is supposed to
I’m trying to show you
The life of somebody like you should be living.
Ohh Baby, Baby,
You could never go wrong,
If you let me hold you.

Fetish

2007-12-18T21:24:38Z

Hokays, i'm wide awake now on my bed, and it's.. LOOK AT THE TIME! :O
I dont really sleep this late. To think i was feeling lethargic and unwell the whole day.
And i'm gonna have to wake up in abt 3 hours. hmm, let's countdown.
It's gonna be a pretty looong day tmr. Gahh.
There's dance prac, and then down to church for meeting. Uhoh, i smell trouble, especially when the caffeine kicks out.
Yer know why, 'cos i drank tehbing for dinner. I dont know if it's psychological or coincidental, 'cos i start rolling on my bed on days when i consume caffeine.
Hmms.

Well oh well, i've decided tt my blogspot is emo, so i've decided to create smth hopefully less emo, and i hope i wont have to switch back to the other again, like i did once.. hurhur. Anyhoos, been having thots in my head so i dont really like to keep it all bottled up. Once i plan to post smth up, it's kinda hard for me to keep it in. Sigh. What to do? >:(
(Pardon the noob layout and all. I'll figure this out some other time!)

Anyways, I've been dreaming alot lately. I dont know why.. Really queer dreams i have. Hmm.
Daydreaming and nightdreaming literally.
These past 2 yrs have been so memorable, with ups and downs and what not.
Well, been hopelessly dreaming tt i could bring 2 yrs back around.
The saying, 'you'll never know what you've got until you lose it,' really seems so lucid to me now.
Now, the past seems to be holding me back, feelings are coming back while i reminisce.
WHY SO STUPS?
I realise how much things have changed, people have grown, i have grown.
I realise how i'm soooo blessed when ppl share their life with me.
Sometimes, i feel so sheltered, i dont know how to help.

Dear God,
I'm really really thankful for this life you've given me. For this beautiful family. For this sheltered life. These troubles that i've gone through, they're really nothing compared to those of people around me, and i praise You for that. Help me to help others, as you would. I want to be life-giving, but sometimes I dont know how to. Please grant me wisdom.
I have a question for you, where are you when the innocent are hurt, when girls are wrongly raped, when innocent lives are taken in accidents and disasters? I know tt you are always there, but I still cant find the answer to this, and i'm sure many dont understand this either. I offer this simple prayer to you. Bless my friends, every troubled heart, every frown and sorrow, take them away. Bless them with inner peace and comfort as christmas approaches. Please also grant me strength and work through me during the upcoming caroling. I love you. Amen.

Oh yeah. Cj dance group is a really queer group; so many different personalities, even conflicting ones.
How're we gonna bond? Uhoh. It's so hard. But i'm sure we'll rock and roll next yr's dance night.
Whooopdeedoo!

Really random thoughts i have.. hmm.
Been having a fetish for david and goliath stuff. Oh goodness!
Loveee their products!
Check this out! DandG!.
<333!

Hokays. I really need to go and catch some sleep boy.
Say hello to panda lynette!

XOXO! :DD

It's 0541 hrs now.
HOHO. 2 hrs to dream! );